Page of Cups: A Moment of Peace

I have been pretty overwhelmed at work of late: the pace has been particularly hectic and I've had a far higher-than-usual number of flames to quench. I'd say I'm a mediator by nature, but even mediators (perhaps especially mediators) need to let off steam from time to time. There were at least two or three occasions in the past couple of months where I used the drive in to work to envision myself thoroughly cursing out the offending party, and putting her or him in their respective places being very honest and forthright about my thoughts and opinions, simply so that once I arrived (at whatever meeting it was that I needed to facilitate) I could breathe and moderate professionally. Yes, I need a vacation. It's not vacation time, however, so I have been craving my weekends like cold water in the high desert.

This evening I pulled a card from my newly acquired Tarot of the Cat People (I'm admittedly not a cat person, but the art is quite interesting) asking: "Where do I need to focus on self-care?" I pulled the Page of Cups:

I could almost feel my soul sigh upon taking in this card image. A young lady sits on what appears to be a sandy hill, under a hazy, sunny sky. She is flanked by a cat companion, quiet and comforting, and a chalice. This card evokes a sense of the 4 of Swords - a time for separation, recuperation, and healing. Indeed the Page of Cups does include healing qualities. Like a flame burning itself out from far too much intensity, I need to be cooled and calmed. Those flames I've been putting out have taken a toll, and a quiet space away from that charged environment will help me to rebuild my emotional wellspring so that I can keep on tending to the responsibilities that fall on me as a leader. I don't begrudge my position by any means; this comes with the territory and ultimately the energies will shift like ocean tides. As they say, "This too shall pass." In the meantime, I need a little me-time, and maybe a cup of mulled mead in that goblet ;-)

Apophyllite Dreams

Dreams have always been important to me. For as long as I can remember, every time I had a vivid, powerful dream, I would write it down - these are the dreams that feel important, that deserve attention and investigation; there is a message there. This does not mean that I've always been ace at remembering all of my dreams. I, like most people, have experienced long periods of time where I either have felt that I haven't dreamt at all, or I only remember a small fragment of a dream, or I remember the essence, but upon going about my morning routine it fades like morning mist in the sun.

I have had what people sometimes call "prophetic" dreams. That sounds glorious, but to me a prophetic dream simply means that you've been clued in to something that is likely to occur, or already is occurring, in real life. I once had a very important, yet rather mundane, prophetic dream about my husband's credit card! Many pregnant women have prophetic dreams about the children developing in their wombs. They are a special sort of dream to have, but that doesn't mean they have to be earth-shattering in regards to the implications of their message.

Dreaming; Image from Creative Commons

I've also had dreams that convey important messages in symbol. In other words, they may be a reflection of something I'm experiencing, a clarification of a feeling, or perhaps my higher self knocking me upside the head. Whatever the source, these dreams speak much like Tarot does - in metaphor. For instance I recall the only dream I've ever hard that's caused me to wake up sobbing: when I was pregnant with my middle child, I dreamt that my oldest had died. I was devastated and heart broken, but the dream was simply symbolizing my deep sadness at the sense of losing the one-on-one relationship that I'd developed with my oldest over the course of seven years. My excitement and anticipation regarding my new little one was balanced by the feeling that I was somehow losing my first child. It was good to recognize that feeling and also to learn, over time, that my relationship with my older daughter was not lost or diminished at all - it was simply transformed.

Apophyllite crystals

A few months ago I served as the beta-reader for Jenna Matlin's really well-done eBook on Tarot reading at festivals and fairs. As a "thank you" she sent me a very cool gift: two pouches of "chakra stones." In the crown chakra bag I found a crystal I'd never heard of before: apophyllite. The accompanying card said that this crystal was great for connecting to higher vibrational energies, and for communication with spirit energy. Sounded good to me! I stuck it under my pillow that very same night feeling that it would be good to keep it within my vibrational field. I had no idea what I was in for.

I woke the next morning feeling like I had been to a quadruple-feature film at the theater. I remembered every dream I had all night long, and let me tell you - I apparently pack 'em in back to back. It was striking and I thought, "If that was caused by the stone under my pillow, then that's the fastest working, most potent crystal I've ever encountered!" That day I did an online search about apophyllite and sure enough I found that several sites list it as being conducive to dream recall and lucid dreaming!

This all started a month ago and the dreaming experience that I had that first night has become the norm. Not only do I remember my dreams every night, but the number of significant dreams that I've had has increased quite a bit as well (or at least my ability to retain them has!). It's absolutely amazing. 

Here are a couple of the more memorable ones:

In one dream a few weeks back I saw a picture of the Ace of Swords, and heard a voice telling me that my air energy was off-balance and I needed to pay more attention to the fact that I was worrying far too much, and underutilizing the strength and power of my mental faculties. It was like a conversation with a guide or my higher self. I couldn't see anyone, there was just the voice and the image, and nothing else but a gray backdrop. When I awoke I had a strong sense that I had truly been receiving an important and direct communication about my well-being. And since that night I've improved a lot in the area of focus and intention, and have curbed a lot of my unproductive anxiety.

Rider Waite Tarot - US Games

Another dream I had just a couple of nights ago featured me wearing a white, flowing, cotton dress. I was going herb hunting, and happened across a grove of Elderberry trees situated in a circle, located in a common green area of what looked like a suburban neighborhood. I was so excited to have found these wonderful trees, and I climbed into the branches with a little plastic sandwich baggie. The branches were covered with lush bunches of white elderflowers, and I started to experiment with harvesting them. Suddenly I stopped myself because I remembered that I'd forgotten to acknowledge and thank the lady of the Elderberry trees! I was upset with myself. So I stopped what I was doing and apologized to the lady for my clumsiness, and then thoroughly thanked her for what I had taken and what I planned to take. I collected what seemed like a lot of wonderful flowers, but in reality was only a tiny fraction of what was available. I had a moment of concern, wondering if the people living in the houses nearby would think I was "up to something" and call the police. However I finished my harvesting, and never saw a soul. I stepped off the tree branch and floated down to the ground. 

Image from Creative Commons

Suffice to say, my dream journal has grown quite a bit lately. Having been so floored by the power of this crystal, I went online and ordered two more apophyllite crystals so that I could create a simple grid with them and selenite. And I've found that my dreams stay active and vibrant now even when I happen not to have an apophyllite crystal under my pillow. Perhaps that's because the crystals are always nearby even when they're not nestled into my pillowcase. Perhaps it's because once the door is opened it's not easily shut again. I don't know. But I do know that this has been one of the most powerful experiences with a crystal that I've ever had, and I look forward to continuing to develop and learn from my dreams with the help of this wonderful stone. I recommend it to anyone seeking to explore their own Dreamtime. There are vendors selling large pieces of apophyllite for quite a hefty price, but a small, natural pyramid (which is what I've been using) can be found for around $3. 

Good luck, and happy dreaming!