Making Space

This morning I pulled the 2 of Swords from the Fountain Tarot (a new acquisition that I am enjoying quite a bit - perhaps I'll do a review soon!). When I see this card I usually think of "impossible decisions." This is a card that, when it features a keyword, is often connected to the concept of peace, or "inner peace." In general I find that whatever peace this card affords, it is only temporary, and it tends to stem from avoidance rather than true ease.

However at times this card is less about avoidance, and more about the benefit of intentionally blocking out external "noise" in order to make space to breathe.

I once pulled this card when I was on Christmas vacation in a cabin in the far north. It was perfect because vacations can serve as a momentary escape from the tumult of everyday life and responsibilities (we can see the 4 of Swords here as well). In a similar way, I have been struggling to make space for things that are important to me: spending time tending to my altar, letting myself absorb self-readings, explore them, write about them, posting blog entries. In a way, I have been so busy lately that it's even been a challenge to spend quality time with my kids.

The 2 of Swords is often symbolic of an incompatibility between the heart and mind. In this case, my heart yearns for space to do these things, but my mind is filled with the many tasks and responsibilities that I am faced with in my new position at work. I don't like how that feels, however I won't be gifted that space simply by waiting to see what happens.... I have to claim it. And that means that I can't ignore these needs I have for quiet, for time, for writing and reading, for my egun (ancestors) and my family. I have to find a balance between what I must do, and create order within these priorities. Doing that requires attention.

Thus I have pushed off everything I "must do" this morning - just for a moment - to allow myself space to write this post, and to think these thoughts. That is nourishment all on its own!